England rugby star Alex Matthews has stepped up as an ambassador for charity Prostate Cancer UK since her dad was diagnosed with the disease. The Red Roses ace now treasures Father's Day more than ever after her father Dave's terminal diagnosis.
A Christmas revelation
It was on a Christmas Day that teenager Alex Matthews, now a top England rugby player, first realised something might be wrong with her dad. She recalls: "I remember discussing with my older sisters that there seemed to be something up with Mum and Dad. They were having secret discussions in the kitchen."
Shortly afterwards her parents broke the news that her father, Dave, a gardener, was suffering with prostate cancer. It's the UK's most common cancer, affecting one in eight men during their lifetime.
The Red Roses' No8, now 32, recalls: "I remember going for a walk around our local park and just crying. He'd gone for a routine blood test and they found that his PSA level was high. But he had no symptoms." However, further tests confirmed Dave was suffering with the disease.
Treatment and remission
Alex says: "He had chemo and was in hospital for quite a long time and eventually had surgery to remove the prostate. Dad seemed to age so quickly, from having nice thick black fluffy hair, then the next time you see him it's all grey and patchy. He ended up being fitted with a bag to collect his urine and that was particularly hard for him as he used to live in shorts. He didn't want to go out of the house, in public places and he had a lot of sleepless nights."
In 2014 Dave was finally given the all-clear from cancer. Alex says: "For 11 years we almost forgot about it." Sadly though, in 2023, the cancer made a dramatic return.
Devastating return
Alex says: "Dad thought he was just suffering from back pain, which he'd had a history of, but it turned out to be a tumour pressing on his spine. He got rushed into hospital for surgery and it turned out he had Stage 4 cancer which had spread to his spine, lymph nodes and ribs."
Alex was on tour in New Zealand with England at the time and had just played in a winning match against Canada when she heard. Shortly afterwards she got another call with the shocking news that this time Dave's cancer was incurable. She admits: "It was the hardest week of my life."
Making the most of time
Thankfully, three years on from his terminal diagnosis, Dave, now in his early 70s, is still alive, despite a gruelling regime of scans, radiotherapy sessions and medication. And Alex – along with her mum Vanessa and three siblings – is now making the most of whatever time they have left.
She says: "He's got low energy and has struggled mentally, but the last two years he's been so much better at speaking about how he feels and we try to talk more about it as family. For a long time he didn't come to see me in games at Twickenham, but now he's being more adaptable and regularly comes to see me at Gloucester too. We make the most of family time together and I'm so grateful for that. He's always telling everyone how proud he is of me."
Ambassador for Prostate Cancer UK
Alex, who was recently part of England's Six Nations winning side, has now stepped up as an ambassador for the charity Prostate Cancer UK, supporting their At Every Step Campaign, which aims to give clear guidance to men and the families of those affected. She says: "It's important to look out for the symptoms (such as needing to wee more often) but then also be aware of the tests you can ask your GP for, like the PSA test."
Cherishing Father's Day
Alex doesn't know what the prognosis is for her Dad, which makes this weekend's Father's Day all the more poignant. She adds: "You don't want to keep dwelling on the negative…I love just sitting with him in his garden on the bench in the sunshine or having a cuddle after a game of rugby. We'll probably mark Father's Day with a nice barbecue together."
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