Two Women Living Together: The Korean Bestseller Redefining Family
A quietly revolutionary account of cohabitation has captured a nation's heart while prompting important questions about what constitutes family in the modern world. Two Women Living Together, the 2019 South Korean bestseller by Kim Hana and Hwang Sunwoo, charts their journey from independent city dwellers to life companions sharing a home, cats, and mutual support without romantic involvement.
From Twitter Connection to Shared Home
When Sunwoo and Hana first connected on Twitter, both were in their forties and committed to single life. Raised in Busan before studying in Seoul, they entered the city's famously demanding workforce - Sunwoo as a fashion journalist and Hana as a copywriter. Discovering shared tastes in music and literature, they bonded over their mutual rejection of traditional marriage, a decision informed by South Korea's patriarchal culture where women in dual-income households spend nearly three additional hours daily on domestic chores compared to men.
Initially embracing the independence of solo living, both women found middle age bringing unexpected loneliness, with their compact studio apartments feeling increasingly oppressive. Their solution was both simple and radical: purchasing a sunlit house together to create a home based on friendship rather than romance.
The Daily Reality of Platonic Partnership
Through forty-nine warm, conversational essays, the book invites readers into their shared life with four feline companions, exploring everything from culinary preferences to retirement dreams. Like any couple, their partnership features quiet joys alongside significant irritations. Hana's minimalist tendencies contrast sharply with Sunwoo's collecting habits, described as resembling "a crow that collects shiny things," with her extensive wardrobe eventually breaking under the weight of possessions.
Their domestic negotiations cover laundry protocols, New Year traditions, and whether thorough tidying is essential before major trips (Hana insists it is). After one particularly heated argument, Sunwoo retreats to her room, scrolling property applications while fantasising about leaving, only emerging when she realises she cannot face the upheaval of moving. As Sunwoo reflects, they "may be stuck in an endless cycle of disappointment and forgiveness, but we never stop pinning our hopes on each other."
Legal Invisibility and Social Recognition
Beneath the domestic warmth lies a radical proposition: that their partnership deserves recognition equivalent to traditional family structures. When Sunwoo requires hospitalisation for surgery, Hana becomes her primary guardian yet remains ineligible for workplace benefits like free flu vaccines offered to employees' families. Their relationship remains invisible on official documentation, prompting their wish for terminology conveying greater responsibility than "friend" - perhaps "life companion."
In South Korea, where same-sex marriage lacks legal recognition, those cohabiting as friends or unmarried partners cannot access equal tax benefits, welfare support, medical emergency authority, or even funeral rights as chief mourners. Progressive legislators introduced a 2025 bill aiming to secure rights for cohabiting partners and friends, arguing that expanding family definitions could address plummeting birthrates, loneliness epidemics, and care gaps. Conservative government opposition blocked the legislation, though recent census changes allowing "cohabiting partners" as a category represent limited progress, albeit insufficient for partnerships like Sunwoo and Hana's.
Global Context and Growing Phenomenon
Interest in platonic partnerships is increasing worldwide as people navigate soaring housing costs and diminishing family-centred care networks. France's Pacte Civil de Solidarité already offers legal protections for cohabiting friends and couples, while Germany's previous government proposed Verantwortungsgemeinschaft ("responsibility companionship") permitting up to six unrelated individuals to pledge mutual care, though current coalition politics make implementation unlikely.
The book occasionally frustrates with filler content and extensive pet-focused passages, while some readers might desire greater contextual exploration of South Korea's historical traditions regarding unmarried, divorced, or widowed women living together for mutual support - a practice with centuries of precedent in Britain and Europe. Questions about neighbourly reactions, assumptions regarding same-sex relationships, and whether single men pursue similar arrangements remain largely unanswered.
Redefining Family for Modern Times
In the absence of comprehensive legal recognition, stories like Sunwoo and Hana's gain particular significance, making visible the growing numbers turning to friends as primary sources of stability, companionship, and care. Their experience demonstrates the multiple ways of constituting family in contemporary society, challenging conventional definitions while highlighting the human need for connection beyond traditional structures.
Two Women Living Together by Kim Hana and Hwang Sunwoo, translated by Gene Png, is published by Doubleday (£16.99).
