Comedian Nikki Glaser has lifted the lid on a series of brutally sharp jokes that were deemed too harsh for the live broadcast of the 2026 Golden Globes ceremony. The host, who fronted the prestigious awards show for the second consecutive year, shared the excised material during an appearance on The Howard Stern Show this week.
The Jokes That Didn't Make the Cut
While Glaser's live monologue included pointed barbs about topics like Jeffrey Epstein's client list and Leonardo DiCaprio's dating history, she revealed that several even more savage lines were left on the cutting room floor. Reading from what she called her "Stern file" on her phone, the 41-year-old comedian delivered the unaired jokes to a chuckling Howard Stern and his co-host Robin Quivers.
The first target was actress Sydney Sweeney. Glaser's joke linked a perceived downturn in cinema attendance to Sweeney's recent box office performance. "So tonight is a night of celebration but we can't ignore that it's a weird time in Hollywood – people just aren't going to the theatres to see things," Glaser read. "If you don't believe me, there was a movie this year where Sydney Sweeney played a lesbian who just bounced around in tiny shorts for two hours and it made $14." The quip referenced the biopic Christy, which indeed struggled at the box office, earning a mere $1.3 million during its November release.
AI, Aging Actors and Awkward Sex Lives
Glaser's scrapped material didn't stop there. She took aim at the emerging trend of AI in entertainment with a darkly humorous jab at Tilly Norwood, a star completely generated by artificial intelligence. "Everyone is concerned about AI," the joke began. "Tilly Norwood is the first star to be completely generated by AI and, somehow, has still been sexually assaulted by three different studio execs."
Veteran actor Sean Penn was also in the firing line for multiple cuts. One described him as being "nominated tonight – I'm assuming for best neck veins." Another pictured him "looking like the defiant last tree standing in a rainforest." A third gag grouped Penn with Benicio Del Toro and Leonardo DiCaprio for the fictional category "least eyes," which led into another swipe at DiCaprio's well-documented preference for younger partners. "Leo why are you always squinting?" Glaser quipped. "I mean I assume it's to read your girlfriend's ID just making sure the year starts with a two."
From Chase Infiniti to Timothée Chalamet
The comedian also revealed canned jokes about actress Chase Infiniti's unique name, suggesting it sounded like a credit card offer. She combined this with another dig at Sean Penn, stating: "Chase Infiniti Pain is actually her real name... Which is also how Sean Penn gets an erection; He chases infinity pain."
Other casualties included a sly reference to Timothée Chalamet's sex life, linking it to Amy Poehler's podcast Good Hang, and a joke about Julia Roberts' nominated film After The Hunt. "I don’t know what it’s about," Glaser said, "but I’m assuming the hunt was to find someone who’s seen it."
Further cuts included a pun about Wicked star Jonathan Bailey being named People magazine's first openly gay "Sexiest Man Alive," with Glaser noting the word "openly" was necessary after reviewing past winners. A final discarded joke pictured Jeff Goldblum at the ceremony not due to a nomination, but because "they were shooting an ad for Apartments.com down the street and he just kind of wandered in."
The revelations offer a rare glimpse into the rigorous editing process behind a major live awards show, highlighting the fine line producers walk between edgy comedy and broadcast acceptability. While Glaser's live performance was widely praised for its daring content, it seems there were still limits to what could be said on air during the glittering Hollywood night.
