A British mother who relocated to Spain two and a half years ago has confessed that she remains perplexed by certain “unspoken rules” regarding food and mealtimes, despite having lived there for an extended period. Many UK residents choose to leave Britain for a new life abroad, with Spain being a particularly popular destination due to its sunny climate, lower cost of living, enhanced quality of life, and more relaxed pace of life.
Cultural Quirks and Social Media
Susie, a British expat, traded the often overcast skies of Great Britain for the sought-after Mediterranean climate. However, even after two and a half years, several cultural quirks continue to baffle her. Like many others, Susie has turned to social media to document her experiences. In a recent TikTok video, she expressed her bewilderment over the “unspoken rules” surrounding food in Spain.
Susie began by explaining: “There seem to be all these unspoken rules about what you can eat and when you can eat them, and I’ve lived here for two and a half years and I still haven’t figured it out. I was talking to my husband today about what to have for lunch and I suggested, ‘well, we could have puré de calabacín (a Spanish vegetable soup with zucchini, potatoes, onions, and leeks) for first course, and then we could have ensaladilla rusa (potato salad) for second course.’ And he’s like, ‘no, those are two first courses – we can’t have two first courses, can we?’ And I’m thinking, ‘oh, I didn’t realise that they had to specifically be for first courses. Can’t we just have one, then have the other?’ But no.”
Contrasting Dining Cultures
Susie highlighted how this contrasts with British dining culture, where meals featuring a starter and main course are typically reserved for “a special occasion,” while everyday evening meals generally consist of a single course with “everything all on one plate,” perhaps followed by a dessert. She confessed that Spain’s so-called “rules” on appropriate foods and mealtimes have proved “really difficult to understand.”
She continued: “I’ve been told there’s a general rule to help figure this out; if you use a spoon, it’s a first course, and if you use a knife and fork, it’s a second course – but what about ensaladilla rusa? I mean, I use a fork to eat that but apparently, that’s a first course. And what about croquetas (croquettes)? I mean, you use your hands to eat those, don’t you? So where do they go? How do you categorise a first course and a second course? I need to know.”
She then shared her confusion over the beloved rice dish paella, which “you can’t eat for dinner in Spain,” questioning whether this rule extended to all rice-based dishes. Susie added: “It’s these little kinds of things that no one really prepares you for when you move abroad, and I think you’ll only truly understand when you actually live in the place for a while. I’ve lived in Spain for two years and I’m still figuring everything out as I go along.”
Reactions and Advice
The comments section quickly filled with people eager to offer their opinions and guidance. One TikTok user noted: “You have funny things too... like eggs are only for breakfast!” Another said: “I haven’t figured it out either, don’t stress about it lol.” A third commented: “Dinner is just usually lighter. Generally, second courses include a fish or a meat. Honestly, you can do whatever you agree on. We only do two courses on weekends.” And another explained: “Generally, in Spain, the second course is the most elaborate, usually a meat or fish dish. Ensaladilla rusa, for example, is a ‘tapa’ or starter meant to be shared with the whole table, just like croquetas. And yes, dishes that are typically eaten with a spoon, like soups and purées, are the first course.”
