Grieving Mother Confronts Daughter's Killer's 'Psychological Games' Seven Years After Murder
As the grim seventh anniversary of her daughter's rape and murder approaches, Lisa Squire has revealed how her child's killer continues to play "psychological games" with her from behind bars. The 52-year-old mother, speaking exclusively about her ongoing torment, describes the inmate as an "absolute coward" who has twice refused her requests for a face-to-face meeting.
Refused Meetings and Unanswered Questions
Mrs Squire detailed how she applied through proper channels to meet Pawel Relowicz, the man convicted of raping and murdering her 21-year-old daughter Libby in Hull on February 1st, 2019. "Twice he turned me down to meet," she explained. "I applied the first time and it took me right through to the end and then said he wouldn't see me. He was appealing his sentence. So then I reapplied the second year and he said 'no' straight away, which completely destroyed me."
The rejection left her feeling she had let her daughter down, forcing her to leave work overwhelmed by emotion. "I thought 'you're playing a game with me'," she recalled, highlighting what she perceives as the killer's manipulation.
Critical questions about Libby's final moments remain unanswered. "We still don't know how she died," Mrs Squire revealed. "We're left with two possibilities: strangulation and or suffocation. I know her date of birth but I don't know what time she died. There's only one man who knows that but he's a psychopath and won't tell me."
Taking Back Control Through Campaign Work
Determined not to give her daughter's killer further power, Mrs Squire has decided against making another meeting request. "I won't ask again because that's the only bit of control he's got," she stated firmly. "I won't let him do that to me so I've stopped. He's an absolute coward. He doesn't like strong women or women, at the end of the day."
Instead, she has channeled her grief into the 'It Does Matter' campaign, which has successfully changed legislation to help prevent similar tragedies. Her work has ensured that non-contact sexual offences, such as flashing, are now treated with appropriate seriousness as potential warning signs for more violent crimes. Police training programmes now highlight these red flags, creating what Mrs Squire hopes will be a lasting legacy from her daughter's death.
The Agony of Seven Years Without Her Daughter
Approaching the painful milestone, Mrs Squire reflected: "I can't believe it's been seven years since I've spoken to her and seven years since I held her. It's still like it happened yesterday."
She described the 48 days when Libby was missing as "absolute torture," noting that "not knowing where she was was actually harder than knowing that she was dead." Libby was finally discovered in the Humber Estuary on March 20th, 2019.
Receiving the confirmation was devastating. "I remember the physical pain," she shared. "I remember saying to one of my friends it felt like my already broken heart was physically breaking again. It was horrendous knowing I was never going to hear or hug her again. But at least she was home. She was back."
A Mother's Final Visit and Lasting Connection
Against police advice, Mrs Squire insisted on seeing her daughter's body. "I needed to be with her again," she explained. "I remember going into the room and just felt like I'd won the lottery because I could hold her hand again and I stroked her face and gave her a kiss."
Though Libby's appearance had changed from time in the water, her mother found profound comfort in the visit. "It was the most healing thing I have done in this entire seven years because I don't think I'd be doing what I do today without having seen her," she reflected. "It brought me so much comfort."
A poignant detail emerged during this final visit: a delicate gold necklace with the letter L that Mrs Squire had given Libby for her 21st birthday just weeks earlier remained around her neck. "It was almost like she was saying 'look you might not know it's me, but the L will prove it'," she said. "I just thought; 'Oh lovely you did wear it'. It was part of me with her when she was away from me."
Keeping Her Daughter Close Through Daily Rituals
Libby's bedroom remains largely untouched, with her ashes resting on the single bed surrounded by soft toys and personal items. "Libby is now back in her bedroom," Mrs Squire explained. "We watch telly together and it feels so right."
She maintains daily rituals, opening the curtains each morning with "morning chicken" and closing them at night with "night darling, love you, see you in the morning." A desk placed near the bed allows her to work on campaign activities she calls "my Libby work."
"It feels really special to have her here," she shared. "I know she's safe here and I know where she is. Sometimes I go in there and it really smells of her in that room. I do find it comforting, especially when I'm working in there. I really feel her presence."
A Legacy of Protection and Remembrance
Mrs Squire has made arrangements for her own ashes to eventually be mixed with her daughter's, rejecting traditional memorials that might reduce Libby to her tragic end. "I don't want a gravestone for Libby, having people walk past whispering 'that's the girl who was raped and murdered,'" she stated.
Instead, she wants her daughter remembered as "an amazing human being" whose death has created meaningful change. "She came back against the odds, proved he had raped her by holding onto the DNA," Mrs Squire noted. "In death she has made a huge difference. In her death countless women have been saved and that's what I want her legacy to be."
Seven years after the horrific crime that took her daughter's life, Lisa Squire continues to honour Libby's memory through advocacy work that transforms personal tragedy into societal protection, while maintaining the intimate daily connection that helps her navigate unimaginable loss.
