Former world darts champion Rob Cross has spoken publicly for the first time about his long-term mental health struggles, revealing he felt "too guilty" to seek help but is now in a better place after ceasing his medication.
A Champion's Silent Struggle
The 2018 PDC World Championship winner, now 35, confessed he has been "low on life" for a considerable period. Cross made the courageous decision to stop taking his prescribed tablets in the weeks leading up to this year's tournament at Alexandra Palace, citing their adverse effects on his emotions.
"I have stopped taking my tablets," Cross stated after his convincing 3-1 second-round victory over Ian White at Ally Pally. "I was on them, I felt low in life, like we all do. Too guilty to speak out for it."
Choosing Self-Acceptance Over Medication
Cross explained his thought process behind the significant change, emphasising a desire for authenticity. He decided he was better off embracing his true self rather than suppressing his feelings.
"I just stopped and thought I was better off being mates with the person inside me instead of trying to shut him off with no emotions," he shared. The athlete, who also lives with ADHD, reported a positive shift, saying, "I have stopped them before I came here, I am OK, I feel great."
He believes the medication was locking away his natural energy, and stopping it has allowed his "hyperness" to return. Cross is convinced that remaining on the treatment would have negatively impacted his performance, bluntly stating, "If I had stayed on it, I would have been out first round."
Breaking the Stigma in Professional Sport
This interview marks a watershed moment for Cross, who admitted he has suffered in silence for "a long, long time." He touched on the pervasive pressure to appear strong, particularly in the high-stakes world of professional sports.
"We all get low and we all grow up and we think to ourselves that we should be stronger and you can’t show weakness," Cross reflected. "And that’s where I’m at, I’m guilty of not expressing myself to the people that I trust with my own life."
Importantly, Cross was keen to separate his mental health challenges from his career. He stressed that his issues are not a product of the darts circuit. "It’s not darts, I would have these problems even without the darts," he asserted.
He concluded with a universal message about the true nature of happiness and the importance of seeking support. "That’s the important bit. You could have every bit of money in the world but if you are not happy, you’re not happy," Cross said. "Anyone that feels like that needs to talk. We can only wear so much as human beings, sometimes you need that extra help."
