A Son's Quest to Beat His Mum at Nintendo Switch Bowling
At a family gathering over Christmas, I faced off against my 76-year-old mother once more in a virtual bowling match. Could this be the moment I finally triumphed over her legendary skills?
My mother brought me into this world, nurtured me, and educated me. She possesses an unmatched resilience and an all-forgiving love, serving as the glue that holds our family together. Yet, in this moment, I was gleefully kicking her backside at video game bowling, and it felt absolutely fantastic!
The Unbeatable Wii Bowling Champion
Back in the 2000s, my mum reigned as the undisputed champion of Wii Bowling. She was simply unbeatable, racking up strike after strike with effortless precision. She was the Dudette in our family's version of The Big Lebowski. So, when she announced her visit to us in Canada, I saw it as the perfect opportunity to purchase the updated Nintendo Switch Sports version of her favourite pastime. At 76, I thought my chances of victory had finally improved, especially if I allowed myself a sneaky practice session before her arrival.
I fired up Nintendo Switch Sports to familiarise myself with the new landscape. Tennis and golf have survived the nearly two decades since Wii Sports, alongside bowling. The tennis offering failed to hold my interest for more than ten minutes, and I've been wary of any golf game involving controller swings since Christmas morning 2009. That was when my wife surprised me with Tiger Woods PGA Tour Golf for the Wii, and I surprised her by throwing out my back after a six-hour marathon session.
Mixed Reviews on New Sports
Volleyball and badminton proved to be a double serving of mediocrity. While young children might find them enjoyable, they didn't captivate this grown-up. Basketball has been carried over from Wii Sports Resort, and Chambara offers an updated take on fencing. The latter remains as chaotic as the original, while the former is still a disaster: the hand motion required for moving and dribbling is one I haven't practised vigorously since my teenage years, and I certainly didn't want to attempt it in front of my mother.
If basketball is a minor fender-bender, the new football game is a multi-car pileup. It's a slower, less entertaining rendition of Rocket League, though it does allow you to strap a controller to your leg for virtual kicks. There's no way a 56-year-old man should attempt to kick something that doesn't exist; it's akin to taking scissors to your hamstrings.
The Timeless Joy of Bowling
However, much like its predecessor Wii Sports, Switch Sports proves worth every penny solely because of the bowling. It encapsulates the very essence of gaming fun and simplicity, which was perfect for our first session, as we were all tipsy. Three generations of the Diamond family engaged in playful silliness, creating a beautiful moment.
Mum wasn't without her critiques of the new version. She found the updated Mii characters too realistic, preferring the quasi-abstract shapes of the Wii originals. She also felt deflated that the Switch merely says "spare" instead of the enthusiastic "NICE SPARE!" Her biggest complaint, however, was the size of the Joy-Con controllers compared to the Wii remote.
"I am happier with something bigger in my hands," she cackled. She's utterly incorrigible, and I know exactly where I get it from.
Sober Reflections and Shared Memories
The next day, it was just my mum and me, playing sober. This session was a different kind of gaming experience—social and laid-back. We chatted about how she fell in love with this game during a Christmas at my house back in 2006. My brother was there with his kids, and my sister-in-law was visiting from Canada. I have zero recollection of this, so thank goodness for an elderly mother to help jog my memory in my dotage.
Introducing her to her favourite game felt like a repayment of sorts, because my mum was the one who initially got me into gaming. In the 1980s, she returned to school to train as a word processing teacher and developed an interest in programming. She bought a ZX Spectrum to learn BASIC, but we kids hijacked the machine for games like Manic Mining. Our addiction to Atic Atac essentially prevented her from becoming the next Brenda Romero.
Mum claims she introduced me to the "game" that changed my life: Mavis Beacon Teaches Typing. She has a point—I type incredibly fast thanks to Mavis. We reminisced about last-minute calls to her theatre school when we needed audience members for GamesMaster, and the joy she felt when I got athletes to wave hello to her on television.
I wouldn't have the life I've had without her.
Hoping for a Gaming Legacy
I hope that when I'm 76, my kids invite me over for a games night so they can finally best me at Street Fighter II, once my arthritic thumbs can no longer execute a Dragon Punch. And I hope their kids do the same with them, continuing this glorious circle of gaming life.
I'm overjoyed to have this time with her to play games again. But I'm even happier for the space we fill around the game and the memories we continue to create. A week after she left, I booted up bowling once more, but I only played for ten minutes before switching it off. It just wasn't the same without Mum.
