Liverpool Funeral Business Offers Unconventional Comfort Through Personalised Rituals
A remarkable funeral service in Liverpool is gaining national attention for its unconventional approach to end-of-life care, where staff members engage in conversations with the deceased and create highly personalised experiences for grieving families.
The Philosophy Behind Speaking to Those Who Have Passed
At Butterflies Rising Funeral Care in Liverpool, founder and lead funeral director Hayley McCaughran believes in treating the deceased with the same respect as the living. "Morning, sir. How are we today? Still looking good, aren't we?" she might say while applying aftershave to a gentleman's neck or preparing a cup of tea that will never be consumed.
"It's important to address them as individuals," explains the 39-year-old former aesthetic technician. "Just because they're asleep doesn't mean they don't deserve the same respect as you or I." This philosophy extends throughout the business, which resembles more of a spa than a traditional funeral home, complete with a waterfall in the reception area.
Personal Inspiration Behind the Business
McCaughran's journey into funeral care began after the death of her mother from cancer at just 59 years old in December 2019. "When my mum passed away, I just didn't know what I wanted to do with my life," she recalls. "She always said she wanted someone in the family to be a doctor or a nurse. I was too old to go into that field, but I just knew I wanted to look after people."
After designing a special resting place for her mother that she visits daily, McCaughran decided to create her own funeral home in 2023. She obtained her Level 3 qualification as a funeral director and established Butterflies Rising with a focus on comfort and personalisation that she felt was missing during her own bereavement experience.
Extraordinary Personalisation in Funeral Services
The business offers unique 'chapels of rest' where families can spend extended time with loved ones before burial or cremation. These rooms can be customised according to family wishes, with McCaughran explaining: "Families can bring in whatever they want - a vodka and Diet Coke on the side, someone bringing the paper in. We can have an Alexa in here with all their favourite music on."
For the funeral services themselves, attention to detail is paramount. McCaughran consults with families about everything from the colour of carriage drapes and horses to personalised dedications on nameplates. In Liverpool, many services incorporate football club colours and crests chiselled into coffins, while others might feature designer dresses or specific makeup requests.
Channel 4 Documentary Captures the Process
A new Channel 4 documentary titled The Fabulous Funeral Parlour spent ten months with the Butterflies Rising team to showcase their unique approach. The programme reveals the comprehensive care process: when someone comes into their care, their hair is washed, clothes are changed, and they're placed in a care chapel. Bodies are stored on-site and embalmed ahead of services.
Tom Shawcross, the 26-year-old embalmer with a decade of experience, explains his perspective: "If you were going out on your final party, you'd want to be dressed, washed hair, clean shaven. You'd want to look your absolute best. So this is a perfect time to do it for this person's final hurrah." He uses specialised equipment that acts as a mechanical heart to circulate embalming fluid throughout the body.
Practical Aspects and Team Dynamics
Neil Irons, 53, serves as the funeral director handling the more practical aspects of the business, though he appreciates the personal touches. "It's very different from a normal funeral service," he admits. The team assists people planning their own funerals in advance, allowing them to specify everything from plaque inscriptions to how clothing should be arranged.
"If they know what they want, why can't that be said, or why can't that be done?" McCaughran questions. "Who are we to judge that?" This non-judgmental approach extends to allowing families to include whatever elements bring them comfort, whether conventional or unconventional.
Looking Toward the Future
McCaughran has even considered her own final arrangements, joking with her team: "I say to these lot, if anything happens to me, I have got to have the biggest Louboutin shoes they'll allow for my coffin, as I can't walk in a shoe! So when I go, I want the biggest heel possible."
The documentary The Fabulous Funeral Parlour offers an intimate look at this Liverpool-based business that's redefining what funeral care can mean for grieving families through personalised attention, respect for the deceased, and attention to comforting details that traditional services often overlook.
