Bill Maher launched the 24th season of his HBO programme Real Time with Bill Maher with a blistering opening monologue that targeted Donald Trump's renewed obsession with acquiring Greenland, comparing the president's foreign policy approach to a dog making a mess then consuming it.
Scathing Animal Analogy Kicks Off New Season
During the season premiere that aired on Friday night, Maher wasted no time in addressing Trump's revived interest in the Arctic territory, delivering what he described as a perfect analogy for the administration's handling of the situation.
'It's a little like when the dog throws up on the rug, and then he eats it,' Maher stated within the opening minutes of the show, suggesting Trump manufactured a foreign policy crisis only to later declare victory over the very problem he created.
Rewinding the Greenland Saga
Maher proceeded to trace the unusual history of Trump's Greenland fascination, noting that the president's interest appeared to have faded earlier in his term before suddenly resurfacing with renewed intensity.
'I thought he forgot about it,' Maher joked, adding that 'sometimes the brain farts pass' during the early stages of a presidency.
The comedian specifically targeted Trump's rhetoric from the previous week, which included floating the possibility of taking Greenland 'by force' – a suggestion Maher mocked alongside Defense Secretary Pete Hegseth, quipping that the official became 'so excited, he droned a dog sled.'
Geographical Confusion at Davos Forum
Maher then turned his attention to Trump's recent appearance at the World Economic Forum in Davos, Switzerland, where global leaders and business elites gather annually.
According to Maher's account, Trump repeatedly confused Greenland with Iceland during his speech, mixing up the two nations in what the host compared to 'calling out the wrong name during an intimate moment.'
This geographical confusion occurred despite Greenland's significant strategic importance, as the world's largest Arctic island offers monitoring advantages for Russian and Chinese military activity while expanding American defence reach in the region.
Declaring Victory Over Manufactured Crisis
Maher noted that Trump ultimately backed away from both threats of force and proposed tariffs against Denmark and NATO allies, framing this reversal as a self-congratulatory win over a problem the president created himself.
'We are declaring victory for a problem that wasn't there until he made it,' Maher criticised, highlighting what he viewed as circular logic in the administration's approach.
The host went further to mock Trump's announcement of a new Greenland agreement, describing it as a vague 'framework' with no written details – an arrangement he joked was modelled after Trump's long-promised but never delivered healthcare plan.
Questionable Benefits and International Backlash
According to Maher's analysis, Trump boasted that the United States would gain new military bases, mining access, and protection against Russian influence in Greenland through this arrangement.
However, Maher countered that these were benefits America already possessed, quipping 'All of which we had anyway. But now everybody hates us.'
He closed the segment by mocking conservative praise for Trump's approach, sarcastically labelling it what Fox News frequently celebrates as 'the art of the deal.'
Panel Discussion and Guest Lineup
Friday night's episode featured Paul Eaton, a retired US Army major general who serves as senior advisor for VoteVets and the Vet Voice Foundation, as the interview guest.
The panel discussion included John Kennedy, the Republican senator from Louisiana and author of the New York Times bestseller How to Test Negative For Stupid: And Why Washington Never Will, alongside Kasie Hunt, anchor of CNN's The Arena with Kasie Hunt.
Strategic Importance and International Resistance
The renewed debate over Greenland stems from Trump's announcement of a preliminary framework deal for US access to the territory during the Davos forum, which prompted a pause in tariff threats against Denmark and NATO allies after weeks of escalating rhetoric.
The president has repeatedly argued that Greenland holds critical importance for American national security due to its strategic Arctic location between North America and Europe, providing monitoring advantages for Russian and Chinese military movements.
Additionally, the island contains substantial untapped natural resources, including rare earth minerals essential for modern technology and defence industries – a combination Trump cites as vital for maintaining American global power.
While the administration frames Greenland as essential for NATO security, Denmark has continued to resist any full sale of the autonomous territory, creating ongoing diplomatic tension around what began as an unexpected presidential fascination.
