BBC Spotlight Documentary Exposes the Harsh Reality of Autism Care
A searing BBC2 documentary, I Am Not Okay, has finally reached national television after being filmed in Northern Ireland eighteen months ago, delivering an unflinching look at the daily struggles of four families caring for their non-verbal autistic adolescent sons. The programme serves as a stark rebuttal to any glamorised portrayal of autism, instead revealing a reality of desperation, violence, and systemic neglect.
Beyond Desperation: Families at Breaking Point
Reporter Tara Mills captured profoundly distressing scenes, warning viewers of the content's intensity. The footage shows teenage boys in full meltdown: lashing out, smashing objects, and violently kicking walls, doors, and windows. In one harrowing sequence, mother Claire is dragged around her kitchen by her hair while pleading with her son Danny. Father John is left bruised, bitten, and bleeding after a prolonged struggle to get his son Rudy into a car.
All parents emphasised their sons' inherent goodness, with Claire stating, "I love the bones of him, I adore him," and Rudy's mother Carly describing him as "a big bundle of love." Yet, the documentary makes clear these families are pushed beyond their limits, receiving nowhere near the necessary support from health and social services to safely manage care at home.
A Familiar and Agonising Struggle
The documentary's narrative resonates painfully with those who know this world. One parent reflected on their own thirteen-year-old, profoundly autistic and non-verbal son, David, drawing parallels to the destructive, albeit unintentional, outbursts depicted. They noted that Mills's footage, while deeply shocking, likely represents only a fraction of the worst moments, missing the nocturnal hours of screaming or the full traumatic impact on siblings.
Systemic Failures and Parent Blaming
The film ignited fury as it detailed the dismissive and often obstructive response from authorities. NHS workers reportedly refused to visit Claire's home due to an "unacceptable risk of injury," blatantly ignoring the constant danger she herself faced. Another mother, Julie, fought for years to secure overnight respite for her son Theo, only to be called to collect him on the second night by overwhelmed staff.
"There's a lot of parent blaming that goes on and minimising your experiences," Julie revealed, highlighting a culture of deflection rather than support. For some, like Theo and the narrator's own son, the only solution has been full-time residential care—a heartbreaking and costly outcome for both families and the NHS.
A Call for Long-Overdue Change
I Am Not Okay stands as an eloquent and heartbreaking testament to a crisis in care. It challenges superficial narratives and demands urgent attention to the gaping holes in support systems for some of society's most vulnerable individuals and their families. The hope is that this powerful documentary will finally catalyse the change that has been desperately needed for far too long.
