A Canadian woman living in the United Kingdom has ignited a significant online discussion after detailing a recurring issue she has faced while dating British men. The 27-year-old expatriate, who recently relocated to the UK, took to Reddit to seek clarity on whether her experiences reflect a wider cultural dating norm or are simply bad luck.
The Reddit Post That Sparked a Debate
In her candid post, the woman explained that she moved to Britain hoping to find a long-term relationship. However, she quickly identified what she calls a "major problem" in her dating life. She revealed that on three out of four first dates, the men have directly asked if they could kiss her.
"I may be old-fashioned here, but I like to take things slow," she wrote, expressing her discomfort with the pressure for early physical intimacy. Her post, shared on December 18, 2025, has since garnered hundreds of comments from people weighing in on UK dating etiquette.
Detailed Encounters: Pressure and Accusations
The Canadian woman shared two specific situations to illustrate her point. In the first, she liked a man and they did share a kiss. However, after just two dates spanning roughly eight hours of total time together, he became "very pushy," pressing to escalate their physical relationship.
When she declined, he accused her of leading him on and stated he would not "wait" for her. This left her baffled, feeling that such a short acquaintance was insufficient for the level of commitment he demanded.
The second encounter involved a 30-year-old man who, despite making date planning unnecessarily difficult, also asked to kiss her at the end of their first meeting. After she politely declined, citing her preference to take things slowly, he invited himself to her house.
Upon her refusal—citing the late hour and work the next day—he labelled her "unaccommodating," became closed off, and ceased communication. Her concluding question to the forum was poignant: "So my question here is: am I the a***hole? Do all men in UK require a kiss before anything starts happening?"
Online Community Weighs In on UK Dating Culture
The responses from other Reddit users were varied but largely supportive of the woman's right to set her own pace. One commenter emphasised the importance of personal boundaries, stating: "Bottom line: you can have whatever boundaries you want. They're the best way to uncover red flags."
Another user, identifying as an American dating in the UK, offered a cultural perspective: "As an American dating in the UK, I don’t think many people are waiting for weeks to progress beyond a kiss. They may very well be out there, but I haven’t met them."
A third contributor offered encouragement, advising: "Whatever the dating culture, within reason, of any country you have your boundaries and people will need to respect that. The right person will turn up eventually."
The discussion highlights a potential clash of expectations in modern dating, where individual comfort levels and perceived cultural norms can sometimes be at odds. The woman's experience serves as a reminder that clear communication and mutual respect remain fundamental, regardless of geographical location.
