Mother's Agony Over Missing Son and Vile Online Trolls
In an exclusive interview, Nerissa Tivy, 57, reveals the ongoing heartache of her son Alexander Sloley's disappearance in 2008, compounded by relentless online abuse from trolls targeting her family. The Mirror is backing the Missing People charity's landmark campaign against tragedy trolling in missing person cases, highlighting the urgent need for respectful narratives.
A Mother's Unending Search
Nerissa Tivy, a bookkeeper from Islington, North London, recounts how her son Alexander vanished on August 2, 2008, just two days before his 17th birthday. At the time, Alexander was preparing to study accounts at college and often stayed with friends, but always returned home. "One day, the house he was staying at called me and said they believed he'd come to harm and was missing," Nerissa explains. "I never saw him again."
She reported him missing to the police, but initial interest was minimal. Alexander failed to return for his birthday, a day he would have undoubtedly come home. It wasn't until over two years later that police began a proper investigation, revealing Alexander had been arrested two days before his disappearance. "Something awful had happened, and to this day I don't know what," Nerissa says, her voice filled with sorrow.
The Dark Side of Social Media
Over the years, Nerissa and her three daughters have faced unimaginable abuse from online trolls. When sharing missing posters on Facebook to raise awareness, they are met with horrific comments from strangers. "People have said he's still here, he's run away from his parents because they were strict," she shares. "I don't take it on board, you'd be depressed. It makes you feel like blaming yourself."
In one instance, her daughter collaborated with a famous influencer on a TikTok video that went viral, only to attract awful comments that even made the influencer fear for his life. "We were just trying to find out what happened to Alex," Nerissa emphasizes. While social media has a positive side by spreading his story widely, she warns of its dark underbelly, where trolls accuse her of being at fault or appearing too happy.
Campaign Against Tragedy Trolling
The charity Missing People, representing the 170,000 individuals who go missing in the UK annually, is calling for an end to tragedy trolling—a form of cyberbullying where perpetrators post abusive, mocking, or sensationalized content about missing persons. High-profile cases like Nicola Bulley and Madeleine McCann have been particularly targeted, spreading misinformation and causing emotional harm to families.
Ross Miller, CEO of Missing People, states, "Every missing person deserves attention to help find them. The public has an important role, but sometimes online sleuths cross a line. Some content is truly vile, causing trauma and even disrupting police investigations. This has got to stop—right now." The charity demands that people avoid speculation, treat real stories with respect, reject AI-generated misinformation, choose empathy over entertainment, and respect privacy once a person is found.
Political Support and Empathy
Melanie Ward, Labour MP for Cowdenbeath and Kirkcaldy, who is actively involved in online harms issues, has backed the campaign. "It is terrible that those who have lost a loved one in such tragic circumstances are being subjected to vile online abuse," she says. "Social media algorithms and anonymity thrive on conspiracies and division, taking a serious emotional toll. There is much to do to tackle online harm."
Nerissa adds, "This Missing People campaign comes not a moment too soon. I try to laugh it off, but it hurts. If I took on the negative, I would have a nervous breakdown. I just pray it never happens to them." She personally believes Alexander is not out there and calls for a murder investigation, urging anyone with information to come forward.
The Mirror encourages readers to sign the pledge on Missing People's website to support responsible narratives and treat real stories with real respect, as families like Nerissa's continue their painful search for closure amidst online cruelty.
