A Milwaukee man has recounted a harrowing life-or-death ordeal after a seemingly innocent meet-up arranged through the gay dating app Grindr descended into a violent armed robbery. Davie Hackbarth, who describes himself as feeling "pretty lonely," matched with an individual whose profile lacked photos but proceeded to arrange an in-person meeting regardless.
From Loneliness to a Life-Threatening Encounter
Hackbarth, a professional linked to LGBTQ+ advocacy via his LinkedIn profile at Corporate Resource Group for Allies and Members of the LGBTQ+ community, told local outlet TMJ4 that his loneliness drove his decision to meet the match. After exchanging messages, he was given an address in what appeared to be a safe, well-lit residential neighbourhood. Upon arrival, the date escorted Hackbarth from his car, and the two walked down an alley toward what he believed was the man's home.
The Moment the Situation Turned Deadly
"I started to get a really bad feeling, and I stopped in my tracks, and that's when he pulled out a gun," Hackbarth recalled. A second perpetrator then ambushed him, trapping him in the alley as his screams for help went unanswered. The robbers cornered him, pressing him to hand over his phone and its passcode under the threat of death.
"He said, 'give us the passcode, or we'll kill you.' So it was pretty terrifying," Hackbarth explained, noting he had never had a gun pointed at him before and realised it was a "do or die" situation. The assailants violently assaulted him, slamming his face with the firearm and repeatedly kicking him until he was nearly beaten unconscious.
Escape and Aftermath
In a desperate bid for survival, Hackbarth relinquished his phone and managed to break free, fleeing to a nearby gas station where he called 911. Milwaukee police have since confirmed a significant spike in violent robberies linked to dating app meet-ups, with the LGBTQ+ community notably among the primary targets. This incident, involving Grindr, underscores a broader pattern of predatory crimes exploiting these platforms.
Community Impact and Calls for Safety Reforms
"It made me feel really sad for my community to find out that we were being targeted through these apps," Hackbarth expressed, highlighting the emotional toll of such targeted violence. He advocates for dating apps to enhance safety measures, including stronger verification methods and proactive updates to protect users from hate crimes and similar dangers.
To prevent such nightmares, Hackbarth and safety experts recommend several precautions:
- Be extra attentive to suspicious profiles, especially those lacking photos or detailed information.
- Always arrange initial meetings in public, well-populated places rather than private locations.
- Inform a trusted friend or family member of your plans, including the time and location of the meet-up.
"Just know you're not alone if this happens to you, there's a lot of shame in these dating apps and I don't think there should be," Hackbarth urged, aiming to reduce stigma and encourage vigilance. He concluded with a heartfelt message: "I really just want people in the LGBTQ+ community to know that this is happening, and to be careful."
