A woman has been left feeling "sickened" and "betrayed" after her husband of three decades confessed to a shocking secret fetish involving the theft of underwear from her closest friends and family members.
A Devastating Confession After 30 Years
The anonymous wife, writing to the How to Do It sex advice column on Slate.com in 2020 under the pseudonym "Panty Thief", revealed the devastating moment her husband came clean. During a heart-to-heart talk, the man admitted he had been stealing used underwear from her female relatives and friends for years.
The couple had been together for 30 years, and while the wife was aware of her husband's underwear fetish and was accepting of it within their marriage, this new revelation crossed a line she could not accept. "He likes to masturbate with soiled sexy panties and I'm OK with that," she wrote. "But to steal other people's, my loved ones, and do this? Please help."
Feelings of Betrayal and Inadequacy
The confession triggered a wave of complex and painful emotions for the wife. Beyond the initial shock and disgust, she was also grappling with a profound sense of personal inadequacy. "I'm sickened by it, and feel today disgusted, betrayed, and inadequate," she confessed in her plea for guidance. "What is wrong with him?"
She emphasised that her husband was otherwise a "good man", making the secret he had carried for so long even more difficult to reconcile. The breach of trust was compounded by the violation of her social circle, leaving her to question the foundation of their long-term partnership.
Expert Advice: 'This Behaviour Cannot Continue'
The agony aunt responding to the letter was unequivocal in their judgement, stating: "This is really not OK." They expressed certainty that the owners of the stolen underwear would be deeply upset if they knew what had happened.
The advisor strongly affirmed that the wife's feelings of revulsion and betrayal were entirely natural under the circumstances. They urged her to have a serious, in-depth conversation with her husband about the profound impact of his actions and the severe breach of trust.
Looking forward, the advice column suggested the couple consider seeking professional guidance from a counsellor or therapist to navigate the fallout. The central message was clear: this secretive and non-consensual behaviour had to stop immediately to address the damage done to their marriage and the wife's relationships with her loved ones.
