Callum Hancock, now 28, was just 10 years old when he was raped by a bully in a den in his back garden. Speaking from Sheffield, he recalled how the perpetrator framed the assault as a game, warning him that telling his parents would lead to trouble. Despite a loving family and happy childhood, the trauma left him questioning his sexuality and struggling with suppressed memories.
Hancock took up boxing to prove his masculinity, but rage consumed him. At 23, he was jailed for assaulting a bouncer. 'I needed help,' he said. 'I was either going to kill myself or kill the perpetrator – or both.' His story highlights a hidden crisis: male rape and sexual abuse remain largely unreported, with survivors taking an average of three decades to come forward.
Last week's sentencing of Reynhard Sinaga, the most prolific convicted rapist in British history, briefly shone a light on the issue. But charities like Survivors Manchester warn that toxic gender norms leave male survivors traumatised and struggling. Founder Duncan Craig, himself a survivor, said men want to talk but need to be told it's okay.
Alex Feis-Bryce of SurvivorsUK added that many men feel emasculated after rape, which silences them for years. Myths that 'real men' don't get raped or that survivors must be gay compound the problem. For Hancock, support from Survivors Manchester was life-changing, but speaking publicly on BBC's Victoria Derbyshire show in 2018 brought an overwhelming response from other survivors, forcing him to confront his own trauma.
Experts say services must adapt to help men, whether through phone helplines or face-to-face support. As Neil Henderson of Safeline noted, phone calls offer a disinhibition effect that can be crucial for some survivors. The challenge remains to break the silence and provide the support male survivors desperately need.
