Scientists Uncover Hidden Psychology Behind What Makes a 'Good Kiss'
Researchers have discovered that a good kiss has far more to do with the "thoughts, fantasies and emotional context we bring to it" than the physical act itself, challenging long-held assumptions about intimacy.
Testing Assumptions About Kissing and Chemistry
Scientists at Abertay University set out to test the common assumption that kissing primarily sparks sexual chemistry, instead exploring how cognitive and emotional factors influence kissing behaviours in romantic relationships.
To investigate this phenomenon, researchers conducted an extensive online survey asking participants about their attitudes, experiences and fantasies related to intimacy and kissing. The study involved respondents from both the United Kingdom and Italy, creating a cross-cultural perspective on kissing behaviours.
How the Research Was Conducted
Participants in the study were asked to rate the qualities they associate with good kissing while reflecting on their own kissing ability. They also reported how frequently they experience intimate fantasies and provided detailed information about their sexual desire patterns.
The results revealed that kissing is "far more than a sensory experience," with researchers discovering that people who often daydream about intimacy tend to place greater importance on contact and arousal when determining what makes someone a good kisser.
Imagination Plays Crucial Role
This pattern held true even when researchers accounted for factors like creativity and sexual desire, demonstrating that imagination – not just physical sensation – plays a fundamental role in how we experience affection through kissing.
Dr Christopher Watkins, senior lecturer in the department of sociological and psychological sciences at Abertay University, explained: "Our findings show that kissing is far more than a sensory experience. It's shaped by the thoughts, fantasies, and emotional context we bring to it."
He continued: "Historically, certain strands of research on human sexuality have focused on sensory experiences and how we respond to physical stimulation, but our study highlights how imagination and internal states play an important role in how we interact with a partner when kissing them."
Therapeutic Applications and Future Implications
The research team believes their findings could be developed into a "simple tool" within couples therapy, helping partners understand how their internal worlds influence their physical connections.
Study co-author Milena Rota, now a PhD student at the University of Leicester, elaborated: "By showing how fantasy shapes romantic behaviour, our research offers fresh insight into the role played by our thoughts in how we express ourselves in romantic contexts."
She added: "Our research could be developed further as one simple tool within couples therapy, looking at how fantasy could guide behaviours – in this case a romantic kiss – where frequent kissing has previously shown to be related to higher quality romantic relationships."
Broader Implications for Relationship Science
By examining both psychological and physical elements of kissing, researchers believe we can better understand why people differ in how they use and appreciate kissing in their relationships, and why a single kiss can feel profoundly meaningful.
The study, which represents a significant advancement in understanding the complex interplay between cognition and physical intimacy, was published in the journal Sexual and Relationship Therapy, contributing to growing scientific literature on the psychological dimensions of romantic connection.
